Doing the Right Thing…

Your decision to be a stay-at-home mom is the most important decision you will make you your journey as a parent.  You have probably thought more about this decision than any other you’ve made… it may go down as one of the top 3 toughest decisions you make in your life.

 

Look at all of the things you feel like you’re giving up:

• Your income
• The impact you have on your household income
• The ability to use your education and training in a paying job
• Your chance to interact with adults
• Your ability to buy luxury things for yourself and/or others in your life
• Contributions to your retirement fund
• Doing what you enjoy and what gives you a feeling of accomplishment and satisfaction
• Your ability to grow professionally

 

… But look at what you gain by staying home:

• Not only quality but quantity time with your children
• You can be “human” again by having a flexible schedule
• You can be there for those who need you, when they need you
• You can actually see your friends once in awhile
• You can grow personally by taking an exercise class, yoga class, or piano lessons while the kids are in school
• You can be a more relaxed wife
• You have time to cook real meals
• You can get to your doctor’s appointments without having to make deals with your manager or co-workers at work
• You can plan a vacation without having to squeeze it into a hectic work schedule and without having to feel guilty
• You can contemplate your future without feeling pressured
• You an find out that there is more to life than work
• You can discover a new way of life

 

… And you don’t have to lose the feeling of accomplishment:

·         It won’t take long for you to observe the many positive results from your efforts in your new job – full-time mom

·         You can still apply your experience, knowledge, education, training and passion in your new role

·         Now is your time to choose what you really want to do, rather than always fulfilling an obligation or taking orders from a boss

·         And if you’re spending your time wisely, you can grow professionally and fill in what you thought was going to be a gap on your resume with meaningful experience.

   

No doubt, even though you have quit your out-of-home job, you may still be thinking about reo –entering the working world sometime in the future.  You should enjoy your time away from the office, but you can still do things while you are “off” to position yourself for your return to the workforce no matter when that might be.  Here are some tips.

 

 

 

Brush off your resume:

Even though you are not looking for a job now, it is a good idea to have your resume up to date at all times.  Keep it in your computer so it is easy to access and change or make additions to as you accomplish things during your time at home.  If you are not happy with your resume, consult the many websites or books that give you tips on resume writing.  Try different formats so that you are prepared to present something when the right time comes along.

 

Volunteer:

It’s not a paid occupation but you are still occupying yourself.  You can make a huge impact on whatever organization you choose to work with.  You are sharing your skills, education, experience, personality, patience – sounds like what you did when you were getting paid, right?  Here are some ideas of places to volunteer:

• Your child’s school
• Your place of worship
• A charity organization
• Any non-profit organization
• A civic organization
• The public library
• A hospital
• A Senior center
• The animal shelter
• A special event in your local area – ie: Sunfest, a political campaign, a fund raiser, the building of a playground – these are large organized events that offer opportunity for you to learn and can give you huge experience not to mention satisfaction.

 

Speaking of volunteering, choose wisely:

This doesn’t imply that you shouldn’t go into the classroom for the sole purpose of being with your child, or participating in something because you want to mix with a few friends, after all, you should take advantage of your status and enjoy yourself.  However, volunteering is as admissible on your resume as any job experience, so choose your assignments as if you were building your professional experience, after all, you are.

 

• If your field is nursing, ask the school nurse or your parish nursing ministry if you can participate in their activities.  
• If you were in the computer field, try to get involved in anything that requires data collecting or activities that would benefit from some automation. 
• If you were in the financial industry, be the fund raising chair or the treasurer for the PTA. 

 

You could also take part in activities of the many non-profit organizations around.

 

Start a website covering a subject interesting to you or something you have specialized knowledge in. 

 

Build your network:

Networking is the most powerful way to get that ideal job when you are ready to return to the paying world.  It is never too early to begin building a network or to continue building on what you already had while you worked.  Anyone you meet can be part of your network.  Here are some tips:

• Join organizations that keep you in touch with people who share your interests
• Get supported – join support groups to share your experiences with others and learn what they are going through
• Make regular lunch dates with previous co-workers to keep up on what is happening in the industry
• Let people know that you’re taking time off, but you plan on returning to work in the future.  You never know what opportunities may come your way from someone who knows what you want.  Remember, if you’re not ready to return to work, you can always say “no”
• Participate in events or conferences that take place for professionals in your field
• Join trade and professional organizations in your field
• Keep in touch with your alumni organizations
• Talk regularly with contacts from former customers, suppliers and competitors
• Join organizations with your church
• Volunteer
• Let people know what you want; otherwise you will never get it.

 

Keep your skills alive:

• Keep your professional memberships up to date
• Subscribe to periodicals in your field
• Read everything you can – there’s a never-ending supply of information on the internet
• Ask your management at your previous jobs what you could do to improve your skills in order to move to the next level, even though you are not there to move, yet 

 

Build new skills:

• Go back to college – finish that degree, get an advanced degree, or just take classes to update your skills.  If you’re not sure what classes to take, talk to a career consultant or speak to your previous boss or other management in your previous company to get input on what would help you grow professionally
• Ask previous co-workers or professional associates to update you on the latest technology and advances in your field.  Use this information to make your training and/or educational choices   
• Take classes at the local high school
• Get a certification
• Learn a new language

 

Work Part-time:

If you really want to work but you don’t want to plunge back into full-time commitment or maybe you need some extra income – Work Part-time.  Part-time and flexible positions are not easy to find but they are more common than ever before due to our changing society.  Here are some ideas for finding a part-time, flexible job.

·         First change your priorities.  You may not be able to find a power job or something that is going to weigh in heavily on your resume, but you can still do meaningful work in your field.

·         Put your network to use.  Contact those in your network that you feel can connect you with this kind of job.  Let everyone you know that you are looking.

·         Talk to friends in business.  Small business owners are often looking for people to help out but may not be able to offer career jobs.  They may also not have the funds to advertise or hire a professional to find them the right person.  The fact that they know you is a huge plus because they need to be able to trust who they bring onto the payroll.  It may be ideal for both of you.

·         See if a volunteer task can transition into a paying job.  You’re already doing the job, the management has evaluated you – it’s a perfect way for both of you to test the job before making a commitment.  If the actual volunteer job is not available, maybe something else on the premises is.

·         Instead of going on someone else’s payroll, try consulting in your field by setting yourself up as an independent contractor.  This allows you to work the hours you like and choose the assignments that best suit your interests and abilities

·         Go into business with a friend or associate working in the same field.  Help each other get contacts or create a service.

 

 

Think about a change:

Your time away from the workforce is the ideal time to think about a career change.  Keep an open mind.  Think about what you enjoy and what you have to offer.  You may make some surprising discoveries about yourself and what is out there for you.  Consider all your options:

• Start a new business
• Start a consultancy
• Work with your spouse
• Work at your child’s school
• Develop a  talent you’ve always had – art, acting, music, decorating, writing
• Consider working for a non-profit organization
• Go into teaching something you are good at or love to do – yoga, music, dance
• Coach a sports team
• Make a business of something you love to do – here’s where you need to be creative… do you love to organize?  Start a business offering your services.  Are you handy?  Offer services fixing or building things 

 

Here are some tips to help you discover what you might be able to do:

• Ask your family, friends, previous co-workers and manager what they see as your greatest talents, values, qualities
• Make a list of those activities that you have the most passion for, what you like to do the most, and then explore to see if others are out there getting paid for what you like to do.  You’ll be surprised what you find.
• Take an aptitude test or personality inventory.
• Ask your children what they see in you and what they think you are good at – you’ll be surprised at what you hear. 

 

Most of all, keep your spirits high:

This is a time to be happy.  Send your family the clear message that you are happy to be home taking care of the nest and of their needs.  Mom-hood is a power job – you have huge influence over your family in that they are observing you closely and modeling your behavior.  When you are feeling good they are feeling safe.  When you are unhappy, they are insecure and maybe even resentful.  Soon you will find that they will approach their life with the same positivism and enthusiasm that you do yours.

 

Enjoy your flexibility.  Even though your family dictates much of what you do with your time, remember how desperate you were for time when you worked?  No doubt, you have more control over how you budget your time as a stay-at-home mom. 

 

Volunteering and your resume

Even though you are unpaid, the work you do as a volunteer is a valid entry in the feared “gap” of your resume.  There is no need for a gap if you’ve been keeping yourself busy in and out of the home.  Here are some thoughts:

 

When you participate in a volunteer activity evaluating your role can give you clues on how to present yourself.  Give thought to how your participation can become an asset to your professional profile:

 

If you’ve been fundraising:

How much did you raise?

Were you the leader of the team?

 

If you were in the PTA:

Did you hold an office?

Did you make any notable accomplishments?

Did you head any committee?

 

If you volunteered at church:

Did you teach?

Did you raise money?

Did you head a committee or chair a large event?

 

If you’ve volunteered at a civic organization:

Did you hold an office?

Did you raise money?

Did you plan something complex or large?

Did you lead a group of people?

Did you plan and/or give presentations?

 

Make entries on your resume if you’ve:

• Held an office
• Raised money
• Lead a group of people in any capacity
• Written any original material that had been published
• Consulted in your field or any professional field
• Taught a class paid or unpaid
• Organized an event
• Worked in an office
• Substituted for another professional
• Coordinated an activity

 

Sample entries:

-Coached Little League team to its first winning season in 6 years through improving morale/sense of fun and teaching basic skills
--Spearheaded quarterly PTA Bake Sale which raised funds for desperately needed new band uniforms
--Gave monthly 30-minute presentations on the importance of blood drives to community organizations

--designed a marketing pamphlet used by church’s nursing ministry